Molly and Bethany do "real life."

See title.

If I love my spouse half as much as I love Amanda Palmer….we’ll be doing well.

—-B

It’s almost B’s birthday!!! B, welcome to 24. It’s….a lot like this video. So. Yay?

Thank you, Internet.

As I was clinging to Hiyao Miyazaki in a search for  the beauty and child-like wonder that my soul needs in order to survive right now, Emily Davis posted this on Pinterest. I don’t know if this will be as refreshing and tear inducingly appropriate to you as it was to me but…check ‘er out.

Or TRY to check ‘er out. The link isn’t working. Fudge. 

It worked when I tried it. I think I need to read this once a month. Quite good. 

I’m filled with stoic delight because of YOU, Pomplamousse. 

LOVE IT

-M

If you have a spare 3 hours…YOU MUST WATCH THIS. ALL OF IT. Or, wait for me and I would totally watch it with you :D

Breakin’ Pots, Catchin’ Fish and Savin’ The World.

I’ve not been getting much accomplished of late. I mean, I’ve folded a few clothes and made LOTS of eggs (I’ve even dabbled in poaching the little fellas…Very je ne sais quois of me, non?) . Mostly, though I’ve started a journey through the lands of Hyrule. That’s right, I’m playing the entire zelda series backwards. Because I have no life. No life a’tall. I’m in the middle of Twilight Princess and I am REALLY enjoying it because of THIS :

THE CAMRADERIE! SWEET HEAVENS THE CAMRADERIE!

THE CAMRADERIIIIIIIE , MAN! THE CAMRADERIE!

I had totally forgotten everything about this game. I’m all like “What’s going to happen next?” Which surprises me. And the Skyward Sword tied EVERYTHING together so beautifully! The writers of this franchise are geniuses and you can really tell that they care. 

But, all that to say, Starting all this over has brought a burning question to my mind. Why are the Japanese so good at creating amazingly attractive men folk?

Let’s just be serious here. Typically when I think of hawt doods one nationality that I don’t dwell on is Japanese guys. Now, mind you there was that one guy in  the Japanese bible study that was like an Asian Adonis…buuuut… I’m just saying typically. Yet, in my limited experience in Japanese movies and video games I have encountered some of THE most attractive characters which I will list for you now. 

1) ASHITAKA from Princess Mononoke 

2) HOWL from Howl’s Moving Castle

3) Haku from Spirited Away 

And, of course, LINK 

Now, firstly, I do realize that I don’t have much of a case built here as three of the characters are from a single creator. I can’t so much as accuse the Japanese of making hotties as I can accuse Myazaki and the Dudes at Nintendo. So, I guess I’ve blown a large hole in my own logic. BUT do you see my poorly constructed point here? Or am I alone? 

Here’s what I think it is: All of these characters are well-spoken, graceful, gentle and . YET they are complete, badass manly men who get shit done.  They are, in essence, the perfect combination of manly toughness and gentility. Which is, I think, every girls dream. Or , at least, what I find myself attracted to on a continual basis (Which explains, in full, why I find myself continually going after fellows who turn out to be gay). 

AREN’T YOU GLAD THAT YOU TOOK THE TIME TO READ THIS?! AREN’T I GLAD THAT I WAS CONVINCED THAT THIS NEEDED TO BE WRITTEN?! It really has no point. No point at all and I can’t even bring myself to go back and edit it…judge my grammar and the quality of my writing gently, if you please ma’am. I think I was just really trying to tell you how much I am enjoying Zelda and…then other things happened and I figured out how to embed images. 

So, this is B-duck concluding your scattered, slightly manic random survey of the evening. I love you and hope that you’re well. 

Welp….goodnight.

B

I feel you, B. I really, really do. This post just gave me an overwhelming desire to watch anime with you. Let’s start a list. Several of these, by the way, feature beautiful men characters. So.

-Cowboy Bebop

-Fruits Basket

-Puella Magi Madoka Magica (we might need to watch some selections of Sailor Moon to prepare for this one)

-Escaflowne

Do me a favor and do NOT look up Puella Magi Modaka Magica. Spoilers will ruin the experience. Or Cowboy Bebop. Or any of them for that matter, haha. :P

-M


Firstly, notice that if you take away the sexy and the vocal talent, add a few pounds and a significant amount of body hair I could easily be Amanda Palmer in this video. There I am In my underwear in the middle of the day, with unshaved armpits, climbing on piles of rubble and pondering my current state of life. In fishnets. Don’t you remember how I was always in fishnets in college? And that big feather waist cape that I wore when I felt pensive? 

Secondly, I also love that you can see her putting on her eyebrows in this video. Interestingly enough, just last week I had to paint part of MY eyebrow on after an incident involving a pair of scissors and a certain Vaginal Fantasy Hangout episode. Ermagerd. 

Finally, you will , of course, remember that she has a crush on one of the greatest british writers of the modern age: Neil Gaiman. Similarly, I have a huge crush on Britain’s leading transvestite comedian Eddie Izzard. Really, M the parallels are uncanny. Amanda Fucking Palmer, meet Bethany Dadgum Ivie. 

But seriously, here is Amanda Palmer being Amanda Palmer. I love this song and I love her because she is ok with being vulnerable. She is ok with communicating to her listeners that, occasionally, she feels like the world’s biggest fuck up. But…she’s not. She’s wonderful. 

So, if by any chance, you ever feel like the world’s biggest fuck up like Amanda and I occasionally do just remember …we both have your back. And you are wonderful. 

—B

Girl in a Bar

Girl walks into a bar. She has dragged three friends from highschool along to this seedy dive. Good friends, friends she likes, but…this isn’t their kind of place. She wonders when it became her kind of place, then immediately plunges into self-consciousness as the few heads at the bar turn as she passes. Maybe they know something she doesn’t. Like that she doesn’t actually belong here at all? The feeling deepens as she wishes desperately that she could play pool. That would be a great way to relax and pass the time before the band starts. She hadn’t realized how early they were. Rookie mistake.

The four girls find a table and order drinks. Well, three of them order drinks. The girl orders a rum and Coke, and later gets brave and orders a Jack and Coke. She hasn’t really learned how to order anything except “something-and-Coke.” One of the girls primly doesn’t drink anything, not even a Coke or water. Another has one drink, and texts her fiancé to ask if it’s okay. The third, the one who always acts like she’s very cool and grown-up and into this kind of thing, is clearly very uncomfortable in this place. She also has a couple of “something-and-Coke”s, and promptly reveals herself to be one of those people that uses drinking as an excuse to act obnoxious. One sip in and the whiny weirdness comes out.

The band finally shows up, along with a crowd. The girl is relieved. The music is good, and the foursome enjoys it and has a good time. Some Airforce bro named Scott sits by the girl. He has somehow sniffed her out as the single one, and clearly wants to, um, get to know her. She has no clue how to handle the situation. Sidelong glancing, barely concealing hilarity, abounds among the group while the girl awkwardly fends off poor Scott.

And while she loves those other girls, she couldn’t help but think the whole time…

"I wish Bethany was here."

Girl sits in her bathing suit in her house on a hot day. She doesn’t have a pool, but that is hardly the point. Girl and Cool Girl have been playing phone tag for a couple of days. She thinks Cool Girl is at the beach with her family so, she is kind of afraid to call. She could interrupt some family team-building game (or whatever families do when they are on vacation). So, she logs onto Tumblr. She reads a charming post. And gets just a little tiny bit teary at the end…..

I’m sorry to steal your narrative style, but …That made me feel nice! Ironically enough, I wish that I was sitting in a dive bar with you, too! What are the odds?! 

I’m not very good in them yet, either ( I make a lot of rookie mistakes too. OH! Remind me to tell you of the time that Ananda and I went to a “pub” If I haven’t already.DISASTER!) I have learned that the key to making it in  a dive bar is not giving a flying f*** about what the other dive bar drinkers think. Order what you want. Say what you want. Wear what you want. It doesn’t really matter. Especially about the drinks. It annoys me when people order things just to be cool. I’ve learned that, in my case, I like light beer. Which isn’t cool. But, know what? That’s ok. An you..you like somethings and coke. And that’s cool! So order it! 

Also, I have a feeling that “the heads turning ” meant that you looked hawt….just so you know. :) And as Airforce Scott noticed as well. 

All that to say….GO MOLLY! GET YOUR DIVE BAR ON! YOU. ARE. AWESOME. Get out there and start not giving flying f***s!

Let’s learn to play ukelele. Maybe Neil Gaiman will hold our music for us?

I have very quickly become very emotionally attached to Neil and Amanda as a couple. If they ever get divorced I’m going to be a MESS.

—M

Oh my goodness. I know. I love them. The state of their relationship is actually something that I worry about. 

—B